The Struggle Bus

Confession time: I've been riding the Struggle Bus for the last couple of months.  I boarded this crazy bus on May 7th with a small weight gain and just kept on riding it through all the end of year activities and part of the summer with my kids.  I used events that popped up on my usual weigh-in day (Tuesday) as excuses why I couldn't go to the meeting (never mind that there are meetings every single day of the week) and I ate accordingly (including all the things I hadn't been eating since I joined WW...you know, like you do right before you start a new diet...kinda like the last meal, only I had a whole bunch of those!).  I kept telling myself I'd jump off the Struggle Bus at the next stop (aka weigh-in day), but each week I just rolled right past that stop and just kept on riding the Struggle Bus!  

Each week, I told myself that I'd get myself back on track and then go back to WW meetings.  But every week, I found new reasons (excuses) why I couldn't quite get back on track....money (high-fat foods are cheaper), schedule (something always came up), special events (who wants to watch what you eat at a party?).  Thankfully, I have this sweet friend who knows the struggle well and she loved me through all of it while constantly encouraging me to get off that Struggle Bus and back on the Weight Loss Train! 

Full disclosure...I have not tracked one bite (except the counting I sorta, kinda did in my head...well, sometimes) and I have not been 100% consistent with using Plexus, either (though I was more consistent with that than I was my eating).  If it hadn't been for my friend stubbornly refusing to allow me to stay on the struggle bus (thank you!), I might have gone all the way back to where I was 10 months ago (shudder!).  But this morning, I got my butt out of bed and got to the very last meeting of the week!  And I kid you not...this was the topic:

SERIOUSLY?!?  Talk about God reading my mail...just when I needed it most, this was the topic of the week!  I literally laughed out loud when I saw it...and told the lady weighing me in about my journey on the Struggle Bus.  After a brief conversation, she gently said, "When you're ready..." indicating that she was ready for me to step on the scale...so I took a deep breath & gently stepped on with my eyes closed (as if any of that would shield me from the reality of what I had done).  As I stepped off the scale, she revealed my fate...I had gained 6.4 pounds.  YIKES!  I was MORTIFIED!!!  All that work undone!  BUT...I have some friends who are with me on this journey and when I shared my weigh-in with them, they pointed out that it took me almost 2 months to gain that...and I've had weeks when I've lost 3 pounds in a single week, so I can recover from this!  I was so embarrassed to reveal my failure, and these amazing friends supported and encouraged me!  Folks, if you are trying to make changes in your life (whether it be weight loss or something else), get yourself a village of supporters who will love you through both the ups and the downs...and encourage you to keep going no matter what!  My leader also said in the meeting this morning that we should expect to gain as we go on this journey.  This is a new way of living...and there will be some ups and downs along our journey.  So, the time has come for me to step off the Struggle Bus.  Will I get back on it again?  Probably...but maybe next time I won't ride it so long!  :)

A Busy Month

No, I haven't totally fallen off the wagon and no, I haven't given up.  It's just been a busy month for me and I haven't had the chance to blog.  On March 19th, I lost 3 pounds (bringing me to 58 pounds total lost pounds)...and then life got REALLY busy!  While still at my WW meeting, I got a text message asking if we could take in an 8-year-old boy and his 5-year-old sister.  If I haven't mentioned it before, my husband and I are foster parents.  While we had a bed for the little girl, taking her brother would take some juggling.  We had to get an extra bed for our boy room and do some re-arranging of furniture to make that bed fit!  The kids are just the sweetest...but with every new foster placement comes extra stuff to do...people coming to visit the house, letting the school know we are now the parental contact, making appointments, etc.  All this and I'm still working on my master's degree online and doing the day-to-day stuff of having five of my own kids (plus homeschooling the oldest, church ministry, etc.).  To say it was a stressful week would be an understatement!  The picture above was one I found to represent a busy mom...but this picture might be a little more accurate of what my life is like...

Anyway, I lost another 2.4 pounds that week...in spite of some stress eating that I did that week (thank you, Plexus!).  The following week, I stayed EXACTLY THE SAME...not an ounce either way!  I'm not gonna lie...there was some stress eating going on that week, too.  But, I didn't gain, so I was happy (especially since I was pretty sure I was going to gain at least a pound that week)!  Last week, I lost 4/10 of a pound...still on the downward slide, so all is good!  So...right now, I'm sitting at a grand total of 60.4 pounds gone...which is apparently what FIVE weiner dogs would weigh!

I have done all of this with almost NO exercise (with the exception of an exercise spurt here and there)...but tomorrow, that will change!  Several of my friends attend Burn Boot Camp and apparently, Facebook thinks I need to join them because I've been seeing an ad for them ALL WEEK!  They are running a $59 for 4 weeks special...so I finally gave in and signed up tonight.  Oh...if you KNEW the research that went into this decision (as if I didn't have enough research to do for my master's degree assignments)!  It all started when another friend of mine talked me into going with her to a free class there with her on New Year's Day to try it out.  I made it through...but didn't feel ready for that level of exercise.  But...it's been nagging at the back of my mind ever since and with less than a half of a pound lost in two weeks and some seriously flabby arms (because even though the fat is making an exodus, the skin is still the same size it was when it inhabited the fat), I have decided to give it a go.  It's only a 4-week commitment...so if I can't keep up (or die trying), we've only lost $59.  

So...now you are caught up.  OK...probably all 3 of the people who read this blog already know me personally and knew all of this anyway...but maybe, just maybe, somewhere along the line someone I don't know will read this and be encouraged by it!  ;)

Challenges

It's been awhile since I last posted on here because life has been crazy.  After my last post, I was preparing for a trip up to Liberty University to attend an intensive class required for my master's degree.  I haven't been on a trip by myself since I got married over 16 years ago...and haven't been on an airplane since my almost 7 year old son was a newborn!  To say there was some stress eating involved would be an understantement, I think.  But, I tried making good choices along the way.

The week before I left, I weighed in at my normal meeting and lost eight tenths of a pound.  Hey...a loss is a loss, no matter how small...right?!?  But, I had a plan for my trip and I was determined to stay as "on track" as I could given the few choices I would have available to me during the trip.

My first challenge came in the airport on Sunday (Day 1 of the trip).  I had a 3 hour layover at lunch time but had a hard time finding something "healthy" to eat.  I finally found this (which I paid WAY too much for, by the way):

I took out the peanut butter, but ate the chicken, veggies, fruit, and mozzarella balls. It wasn't too bad...but certainly not what I WANTED to eat!  ;)  When I landed in Virginia, I drove to the hotel and got myself checked in before meeting up with one of my classmates for dinner.  Part of the intensive package included a dining plan for the week that started on Monday.  We decided to go to Cracker Barrell and I got the grilled chicken, green beans...and dumplings.  Yes, I know dumplings aren't great for you, but I'd eaten pretty healthy up to that point and had the WW points to do it, so I indulged.  :)  

Class started bright and early Monday morning with many stressful challenges (mostly with the hotel, but that's another story).  Our breakfast options each morning were eggs, bacon, breakfast potatoes, oatmeal, fruit, breads, and pasteries.  I won't go into a blow-by-blow of what I ate each day...but since eggs and fruit are 0 points on the WW program, I had those each day along with a different carb option.  Lunch at the dining hall was included in our package and was like a huge food court style buffet.  Many options to choose from, not many of them all that healthy...and all you can eat.  But, I made the best choices I could without feeling totally deprived.  Dinner was provided at the hotel each night and I did the best I could there...again, not the healthiest options, but I did what I could.

The class ended at noonish on Friday and there was a WW studio in the same plaza as where our class was held, so I made my way over there for a quick weigh-in to see how I'd done.  I tried to keep in mind all the things I'd tell someone else on this journey given the same situation...that it was a different scale, different day, different time of day, I'd already eaten that day, and I was wearing heavier clothes than I'd ever wear in Florida.  With that in mind, I sucked it up and stepped on the scale.  To my horror, I had gained 2.8 pounds!  YIKES!!!!  Definitely NOT what I wanted to see on that scale!  I was meeting some fellow classmates for lunch after...and let's just say I was not in a good mindset to be good.  I wasn't horrible, but I definitely didn't make the best choices I could have.  

The flight home the following day was long.  This time I had an almost 4 hour layover in the airport around dinner time.  I did not go for the healthiest option available, but still tried to stay somewhat on track.  When I got home, I struggled a bit with WANTING to get fully back on track, but I FORCED myself to make better choices.  I tracked everything I ate (and had been mostly tracking during the trip as well...just not EVERYTHING)!  ;)  

I'm not gonna lie...I was quite nervous heading into my regular weigh-in on Tuesday.  It had only been 4 days since my weigh-in with the almost 3 pound weight gain and I had NO idea what to expect now that I was back in my regular weigh-in clothes at my regular weigh-in location.  To my GREAT surprise, I was DOWN 3.4 pounds!  I had actually lost more than I had gained on the trip!  I attribute this to some of the things I tried to remind myself of earlier (different location, different clothes, different time of day, etc.)...but also the fact that despite my food choices on the trip, I was pretty faithful to take my Plexus products.  I think they kept me from going totally overboard, and the Block kept some of my bad choices from taking up permanent residence on my body!  :)  

All this to say, I am now down a total of 55 pounds since August 27th!  That, my friends is the same as a 5,000 BTU Air conditioner (according to the weight loss comparison pictures I've found on the internet).  I have no idea what that is, exactly...but I do know it is quite an accomplishment...and one that I'm quite proud of right now.  :)  The pounds are not falling off as quickly now as they did in the beginning of this journey...but they are still coming off.  This is a long journey for me...one where some weeks will be faster than others...and I'm learning to be ok with that and refusing to quit.  :)

Small Victories

This weight loss gig is all about stringing together a bunch of small victories.  The individual weeks aren't much to write about in their own right.  I mean, don't get me wrong, I love seeing that scale work it's way down to smaller numbers each week, even if it is just a fraction of a pound.  But when we look at the bigger picture and see how those small victories each week add up, it is inspiring!  :)  

But victories aren't just won on the scale.  Sometimes those little differences add up to what we call non-scale victories.  And to be honest, when I thought about this blog on Monday, I thought I'd just be writing about non-scale victories because I really didn't think I was going to lose.  I had not been very faithful to take my Plexus products every day and I had made some eating choices that weren't quite in line with WW guidelines.  So, I was fully expecting to have to admit to the few of you who actually read this blog that I had not lost any weight this week or that I had gained.

In fact, I was so sure that's the direction that my blog was going to take that my subconscious created quite the picture in my dreams the night before weigh-in day.  I dreamed, probably in the wee hours of Tuesday morning, that I was at my friend's house.  This friend is also doing WW and has been a great encouragement to me.  In real life, her birthday was Monday and she had posted pictures of her family birthday celebration, so I'm sure this played into my subconscious story line.  Anyway, her family had prepared this HUGE spread of yummy food.  In my dream, I had stopped by on my way to weigh-in and told my friend that I was going to gain anyway so I might as well enjoy myself...and pulled up a chair!  LOL!

So, before I get to what actually happened on the scale at weigh-in on Tuesday, let me share with you the story I planned to tell about my non-scale victory.  This past weekend, I was outside with my kids.  Our house is on a little over two acres of land, in the shape of a rectangle...which means we don't have a lot of space on the sides of our house, but we have a fair amount in the front and a HUGE amount in the back.  It's one of the things that attracted me to the house because it offered my kids a great area to run, play, and explore.  However, in the four and a half years we have lived in this house, I had never been toward the back of the property.  I don't think I've made it more than a few yards away from our back door, to be honest.  It always seemed SOOOOOOOOO FAR!  I would be out of breath just getting off the back poarch (or lanai, as it is called in Florida) and to the kids' playground.  But this past weekend when I was out in the back yard looking for something my kids had lost, I found myself at the far back and feeling fine!  That, my friends, was a HUGE victory that can't be measured on a scale but came as a result of all those small victories on the scale that helped me get healthier.

So, as I walked into the WW meeting on Tuesday morning to face the scale, I was hoping for the best but prepared for the worst.  I honestly thought if I lost anything, it would be half a pound or less.  BUT...the scale showed that I had lost a WHOLE POUND!!!!  Now, a pound might not seem like much to you...but when you add that pound to the others that have left before it, you find that I've now lost a total of 53.6 pounds!  According to the weight-loss pictures I've found online that compare pounds lost to objects that you can hold and measure, I've lost 21 horseshoes!!!  My nephew would be so proud...because while I have no idea what 21 horseshoes weighs, I bet he does!  He owns and shows horses, so he's held a few horseshoes in his lifetime, I'm sure!

So...while a pound might not sound like much, to me, it was a BIG deal!  It's all in how you look at things!  When I thought I'd lost less than half a pound and saw the scale move more than that, a whole pound was almost enough to make me do a happy dance.  But other weeks, when I thought I'd had a pretty good week and the scale only showed a pound (or less) lost, I could easily get discouraged.

That's why it is important to take those small victories and then look at how they are adding up to get you to that big goal!  I can look at the one little pound I lost this week...or I can look at the 53.6 pounds I've lost since the end of August...or I can look at the fact that I still have probably another 100 pounds to go.  If I focus on the 1 pound or the 100 left to go, I'm probably gonna feel discouraged....but if I focus on the 53.6 pounds that have left my body in a little over 5 months, I'll realize just how far I've come and that the rest of the journey is just as doable...and I'll feel encouraged!  So, that's where I'm trying to keep my focus these days!  :)

Want to know more about WW, Plexus, or my journey in general?  Feel free to comment with your email below and I'll be happy to tell you more!  :)

God bless you!  <3

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

I just realized as I went to make this week's blog post that I had posted last week's weigh-in blog on my fostering blog (Loving on the Least of These) instead of this one...OOPS!  ;)

After a 3.4-pound weight loss last week that got me to my 50-pound mark (and maybe a little just too much celebrating that fact), I knew going into this week's weigh-in that I wouldn't be seeing a big drop this week.  I was just hoping that the number on the scale would be less than it was last week...even if by a tiny smidge.  And it was... eight-tenths of a pound to be exact.  Not quite a whole pound, but better than I thought it might be, so I'll take it.

Regardless of whether I lost a little or a lot, I like to think back over my week to see what worked and what didn't.  The previous week had been a bit of an emotional roller coaster for me.  I was so excited about hitting that next big milestone...it almost felt like I'd crossed a finish line.  And yet...I still have a long, long way to go!  In reality, I've only crossed the first major checkpoint.  I let my hair down a bit after that big loss...er, win!  ;)  I'm not gonna lie...I indulged a little.  Life also got in the way of a couple of my workouts.  I also missed a few of my Plexus supplements during the week.  And it all showed on the scale.

If I just look at that one week, I could get really discouraged.  If I just focused on the failures, I could easily give up.  Decide I've come far enough.  Go back.  Give in.  Let the addiction take over yet again.  But, I've played that hand before and it didn't end well.  I lost 80 pounds once before...worked hard for those 80 pounds.  But then Life happened big time.  My cousin who had been my biggest motivator and encourager moved away, I started my teaching internship while still working full time at a conference calling company, and I was only sleeping about 3 hours per day during the week.  Slowly those 80 pounds crept back on...and now, even after losing over 50 pounds, I still have another 25 or so pounds to lose before getting to what I weighed BEFORE losing those 80 pounds!  Talk about humbling!

BUT...instead of focusing on one tough week or where I've been or how far I still have to go, I'm choosing to focus instead on how far I've come THIS TIME!  All those other pounds I've lost and gained before were just training to prepare me for this battle.  I'm stronger now.  My motivation is NOT in another person but in me and what God is doing in and through me!  I'm not competing against what has been done in the past or what someone else is doing, but on what I am doing now!  I have now lost a total of 52.6 pounds since August 27th...just shy of 6 months.  I've lost as much as a 40-inch flat screen TV!  Just for fun (and because another friend suggested it), I decided to weigh my three middle kids.  The older of the three weighed in at 50.4 pounds, the other two weighed in at 41.4 pounds each.  I have lost 2.2 pounds more than my son who will be 7 years old in June!

Tonight, my husband and I have an opportunity to go out to eat with our oldest while the younger kids enjoy a special event.  We are going to Olive Garden because it is my teenage son's all-time favorite restaurant.  Do you KNOW what special they have at Olive Garden right now?  NEVER-ENDING STUFFED PASTA!!!!  Six months ago, I would totally have chowed down on some stuffed pasta...maybe a few bowls.  But instead, I took the time to look through my WW app and make a plan.  I do NOT have to give up the salad and breadsticks I love so much...I'm just going to pair it with a low-point soup and enjoy!  And I'll probably take some Plexus Block to combat the carbs in the breadstick (or two) that I will eat.  I have the points for them...but the Block is a great tool to add in to help make sure those breadsticks don't stay around for the weigh-in on Tuesday!  ;)

It's all about choices.  I'm making better choices and I'm using the tools I have at my disposal to get me to that final goal!  I've got a BIG birthday coming up in July...I'm hoping to be down another 50 by then.  It won't happen all at once...but it can happen one choice at a time!  And just like the turtle in that famous children's fable, I'll keep plodding along.  Maybe I'll hit the 100-pound mark by my birthday...maybe I'll end up just shy of it or just past it...but either way, I'll get there! :)

Finally Finding my Groove & the Tools I've Used To Get There

I started this blog way back in 2013 and last posted in it almost 2 years ago.  A lot has happened in my life during that time and I wasn't sure if I would ever come back to this blog...but today just felt like the day to make a comeback!  :)  After all, I've found some success and seem to have finally found my weight loss grove...so now, maybe, just maybe, I've got something to say that others might wanna hear.  ;)

If you know me or you've read this blog, then you know my struggle with my weight has been a life-long battle.  I've found some success...and I've had lots of failures.  I came into this world weighing 9 pounds...pretty big for a newborn...but not if you consider I was about 3 weeks late.  I guess I'm just a late bloomer.  ;)  Overall, I was normal size until I was about five or six years old...when adjectives to describe me might have been "chunky" or "husky" or "plump"...or even "healthy" (but not in a good way).  There are some psychological reasons for that, I'm sure.  A lot of changes were happening in my life around that time and food became my way of coping with those changes.  It became my drug of choice if you will.  I vividly remember the first time I recognized that food had an impact on my mood.  I was about 17 years old or so and was really upset about something.  I stopped at DQ for a Blizzard and a few bites in, suddenly felt calmer.  However, I did not make the connection between that and my weight issues.  It only fed the addiction and when I was upset, I began to turn to food even more to comfort me.  My weight has fluctuated up and down for pretty much the rest of my life.  I go in cycles of trying to lose weight, getting frustrated & giving up, swearing never to diet again...only to decide to give it one more go sometime later.  

But here I am, five months into a new rhythm and finally finding a measure of success.  It started innocently enough.  A conversation with my mother about WW.  She offered to pay for my initial start if I would give it another go (I've lost count of how many times I've tried WW and failed in the past).  The conversation happened at just the right moment and I agreed.  Deciding to strike while the iron was hot, so to speak, I asked my hubby if I could go ahead and sign up.  He agreed...and so my journey began on August 27, 2018.  

In addition to following the WW plan, I decided to get more consistent with using Plexus...and tried a few of their new products as well.  I now take Metaburn and Edge every morning with my Plexus Slim drink.  At night, I take the ProBio pill and when I eat a high-carb meal, I pop a couple pills of Block.  I discovered this combo (WW & Plexus) is just the one-two-punch I need to be successful!  I lost 10.4 pounds my first week and have consistently lost an average of 2-3 pounds per week since.  Another factor has been the encouragement of others who are on the same journey and my own determination to get it done this time.  The last time I was this successful, I had the encouragement of my cousin Kathy to push me along.  She saw me at my then heaviest weight and, having successfully dealt with her own life-long weight battle, knew the struggle well.  We started with exercise.  She had recently given birth to her daughter, whom I adored.  She invited me to take walks with the two of them.  Since I loved spending time with my cousin and her daughter, I agreed.  Then she started a weight loss group at our church and I joined that as well.  I lost about 80 pounds or so...but when my cousin and her family moved, I lost my motivation.  Slowly, the weight crept back on.  I tried several times to lose the weight again, but without the motivation my successes were short-lived.  My addiction to food was more powerful than my desire to lose weight.

But now, Kara's got her groove back!  As of my weigh-in last week, I've lost a total of 48.4 pounds this time around.  This past weekend, I was in Sam's club and happened to see a 48-pound bag of dog food (pictured above).  Realizing that's almost the exact amount of pounds I'd lost to that point, I decided to pick it up and feel the weight I'd lost so far.  MAN!  That was one HEAVY bag of dog food...and I'd been carrying the equivalent of that weight around on my body for quite some time!  No wonder I was tired all the time & found it hard to get off the couch to play with my kids!  I've still got a long way to go...but realizing how much I've lost already and how much better I feel now, I can only imagine how much better I'm going to feel when I get a couple more of those bags worth of weight off!  :)

All this to say that if you need to lose weight...whether you need to lose 10 pounds or 100, you CAN do this!  I found some tools that really helped me find my groove...but none of them would have worked without my determination to make it work.  I had to be ready.  I wish I'd gotten ready years ago...but I can't go back and change that.  I can only start from where I am and make the change going forward.  It's not easy, and every day...shoot, sometimes every minute...I have to make choices about whether I'm going to let the addiction win or my desire to be healthy.  Today, it's been my desire to be healthy.  Tomorrow, I'll weigh in again and hopefully, I'll have hit that 50 pound mark I'm hoping for...if not, there's always next week.  :)

When You Want to Exercise But Your Body is Having None Of It!

I know...I haven't blogged in awhile.  At least not on this blog.  And there's really no excuse...though I could give you a few.  I've just been very frustrated lately and didn't feel I had anything of value to say.  But the truth of the matter is that I've been on a bit of a roller coaster with my weight loss, mostly downhill (and not in a good way).  \

My last post was in October...it's now March, that alone should tell you something.  In October, I was starting to give up on myself.  You know...the old excuses...Halloween candy, Thanksgiving, Christmas...too many temptations to overcome.  Not to mention, I was buying sugar laden flavored popcorn by the Sam's Club bagfulls just so I could get enough cloth Santa sacks (that they came in) for all my kiddos at Christmas.  Ya know, because that would make Christmas morning a little more Pintresty...I've always wanted to be a Pinterest Mom.  ;)  But to be honest with you, I really didn't even WANT to try to eat healthy.  Sure...I wanted to BE healthy, but I just didn't want to do the work necessary to get there.  I'm not sure I even believed I could...after all, I've tried for several decades and never really been successful.

Then a friend talked me into a BeachBody challenge in January.  I love a good challenge & felt like it was exactly what I needed to get motivated.  And it was!  I was drinking the Shakology and loving it.  I was eating healthy.  AND...biggest surprise of all, I was exercising and ENJOYING it!!!  Not since the time my cousin was my exercise buddy could I say "exercise" and "enjoy" in the same sentence! And even then, it was the time with my cousin that I enjoyed, not really the exercise.  ;)  But I really did enjoy the BeachBody exercise video...and my little kids loved doing it with me!

BUT...one day while exercising, I heard a "pop" and felt a sharp pain in my knee.  I had to sit down immediately.  The pain didn't last long, so I got up and kept going.  And I kept going.  And sometimes I even pushed past the pain.  But the pain never fully went away, so I checked with my doctor & she suggested I rest it for awhile (I actually got doctor's orders NOT to exercise!), take some ibuprofen and see how it did.  I'd like to say that was all it needed...but it didn't.  It still hurts when I stand up after having sat for awhile and I have to limp for awhile before I can walk normally.  Sometimes it will lock up on me while I'm walking and I end up walking like I've got a peg leg.  And the pain is worse.  So, last Thursday found me back in the doctor's office...this time with a different diagnosis.  She suspects a meniscal tear.  YIKES!  I will go for an MRI on Saturday & then follow up with an orthopedic doctor.  I'm praying this doesn't mean surgery...ain't nobody got time for that in this house!

I'm REALLY bummed!  Did I really just say that about not being able to exercise?  Why yes, yes I did!  And I'll tell you why.  I had a goal of losing a lot of weight by October...and I'm not making much progress.  Why October, you might ask?  Well, my hubby has a conference for work in Orlando that month and the kids and I always go with him on these work trips.  We are hoping to be able to do some fun things with the kids while we are there and I really don't want to be so big that I can't fully enjoy our time there...or to be physically unable to do some of the things we have planned.  So...if you are still following my blog, please pray for my knee to heal quickly and for me to find the motivation to eat healthy during this time.  When I'm exercising, the motivation to eat well is so much easier.  Pretty sure that's because I don't want to undo all the hard work I've just done!  ;)

Three Little Words

It was supposed to be a fun thing that showed up in my Facebook newsfeed.  A word search with a jumble of letters...first three words you find describe you.  The puzzle is at the top of this blog post...what do YOU see first?  My eyes first landed on:

Fat.  Bad.  Broken.

And what's really scary is that is exactly how I'm feeling about myself right now.  I'm totally disgusted with myself.  I keep trying to make changes...and I keep failing.  Two steps forward, three back.  I feel like I'm totally broken.  I'm not giving up...but I'm just so sick of failing.

Today was the epitome of those feelings.  A friend was having one of those home parties where you go and buy stuff.  Kinda like Tupperware or Pampered Chef...but this was clothes.  Leggings, to be exact.  Leggings & skirts with tops to go with them.  They are very cute...if you are a normal sized person.  Leggings are just not for people my size.  And under normal circumstances, I would have avoided this type of party like the plague.

The invite to the party said you didn't have to buy anything just come out and have fun...and chance for moms to get together and let the kids play.  And so I went for the sake of my children...a chance to get my homeschooler socialized.  LOL!  I figured I might look at the tops maybe.  But I was mostly going for the fellowship.  I looked at a few things, but didn't find anything I really liked and fit in my budget.  My friend kept encouraging me to try some leggings on.  She singled me out and wouldn't let it drop until I tried them on despite my polite protests.  I was beyond uncomfortable...but I went along with it so as not to make a scene and draw even more attention to myself.  And once in the safety of the make-shift dressing room, my horrors were confirmed.  I could not even get the leggings on.  I redressed in the outfit I'd worn to the party and quietly put the items away and found a place to sit, hoping no one would notice me.  Everything in me wanted to flee at that moment, but I knew I could not do that without making a scene since my boys were spread out over the play area.  Though I'd hope to sit there without being noticed, it was not to be.  Another friends saw my feelings sitting on my sleeve and asked if I was ok.  I simply nodded and held up my hand with a desperate hope that she would allow me to regain my composure.  She did.

 My friend having the party, however, comes over and says, "SOOOO...how did it go?"  I quietly told her I could not wear them, hoping that would be the end of it.  It wasn't.  "Well, WHY not?!?" my friend pried.  I'm sure my cheeks flushed a bright crimson as tears began to well up in my eyes.  "Because I can't get them on my fat body" I said in my defeat.  The tears began to fall and the scene I desperately wanted to avoid became a reality as others began to notice and circled around me.  

To my friend's credit, she did come to me later and apologize.  She's one of those people who can't possibly understand what it is like.  She's one of those ultra healthy people who drinks raw milk and eats seaweed.  She's never experienced my struggle.  I'm sure she has struggles of her own.  But the struggle of food addiction, like miscarriage or infertility, can only truly be understood by those who have experienced it themselves.

Even though I'd seen that crossword and found those words several days before this incident, I couldn't have felt more fat, more bad, more broken than I did at that moment.  I hate myself for what I've allowed my body to become...and yet, I feel powerless to change it.  In the women's Bible study group at my church, we've been studying the book of Romans and a verse in chapter 7 describes me and my relationship with food perfectly:

"For I do not understand my own actions.  For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate...For I have a desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep doing."  ~Romans 7:15, 18-19

I know the right things to do.  I know I should eat less and exercise more.  I know I should eat healthier foods.  I know I should avoid sodas.  I know, I know, I know...I should, I should, I should.  It's not a lack of knowledge...it's a battle within myself.  I know the right thing to do, but the addiction lies to me and tells me one more time won't hurt, we'll start again.  And so I give in...or I spend hours fighting the craving.  Either way, I feel like I lose.

Please pray for me.   God is the ONLY one who is able to fix this in me.

Falling Off The Wagon and Getting Back On...It's A Daily Struggle!

If you read my last blog post, you know my struggle with weight has been a life-long one, and a daily one as well.  Sometimes it's a minute by minute struggle.  But the difference now from where I was a couple years ago is that the time between falling off the wagon and when I get back on is becoming hours rather than days, weeks, months, or years.  Oh...and I've also decided I'm no longer ON A DIET.  No, I don't just eat whatever I want, whenever I want it.  I'm just changing my mindset.  In the past, a diet was something I went on to lose weight, struggled through it as long as I possibly could, all the while looking forward to the day when the diet was OVER so I could eat whatever I wanted. Which would lead to weight gain...and eventually the cycle would repeat itself.  I believe they say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result every time.  So...I guess that makes dieting a pretty insane thing to do, huh?

As far as diets, I've pretty much done (and failed) them all...Weight Watchers (failed that 3 or 4 times, at least), Adkins, cabbage soup diet, any diet I found in a magazine or a friend was doing at the time that might possibly work...I think the craziest one I went on was the Sour Kraut Diet (and I was probably all of maybe 12 or 13 when I did that one).  I don't remember all the details about the diet or even if that was the official name of it, but I do remember it involved drinking 4oz of sour kraut juice 2-3 times per day.  Now, I like sour kraut...on a hot dog!  But not the juice...until it promised to melt pounds off my overweight body (which probably wasn't quite as overweight as I thought it was at the time, especially as I look back on it with wiser eyes set in a face far chubbier than my preteen self could have ever been)! It's a wonder I still love sour kraut today (but only on my hot dog or reuben sandwich...never the juice)!  Shoot...I even tried starving myself once.  I was 17 and desperately wanted to go on a church trip but my mother wasn't keen on the location.  My dad made an off-handed comment saying that if I could lose 20 pounds in the next two weeks, I could do it.  I took him at his word and survived on mostly peppermint candies and water for the next two weeks!  AND...I lost 22 pounds!!!  I'm sure he made that comment thinking that it wasn't possible & would get me off their backs about it...but he totally underestimated my willingness to do whatever it took to go on that trip!  By the way, I did get to go on the trip!  ;)

So...why do I tell you this?  Because I've tried it all...and I've failed it all.  Even the most successful program I've done, First Place - a faith based weight loss program that I would describe as Bible study meets Weight Watchers.  I was successful for awhile...long enough to lose 80 POUNDS!  I attribute this success to my cousin Kathy who was a huge cheerleader for me at the time.  Very much like me, Kathy had also struggled with her weight as a child.  But very much unlike me, she had become victorious over her weight issue in her childhood.  Shortly after her daughter was born, she and I began to take walks together while pushing her daughter in the stroller (I was single at the time and we lived close to each other).  While we walked, we talked about life.  She knew I was unhappy with my weight issue (this was around the time the picture was taken that I mentioned in my previous post), but she never once made me feel guilty or ashamed.  On one of these walks, she mentioned that she and another lady from our church were starting a new weight loss program at our church and asked if I'd be interested in being a part of the group.  I agreed, not knowing what to expect, but wanting to be a part of whatever my cousin was doing at that time (not to mention, the idea of losing weight was enticing, too)!

Each week, we kept track of what we ate (following the diabetic exchanges meal plan) on forms that we turned in each week when we weighed in privately with the leaders.  Then we all met together for Bible study and a time of sharing successes & challenges of the week, as well as prayer requests.  The other lady was in charge of the Bible study and my cousin was in charge of the weight loss portion.  Kathy made comments on our weekly food journals and then gave them back.  Sometimes she made suggestions for changes we could make (such as eating only 10 fries instead of a whole order), sometimes the comments were to celebrate something we'd done right (even when we think eating a few goldfish while serving in the church nursery was a bad thing but she noticed I actually had exchanges for it), sometimes they were challenges for something to push us along (one of mine was to go a whole week without eating any french fries)...but always the comments were positive!  I flourished in this environment.  For once, I wasn't berated for my failures...just given ideas for how to keep them from happening again.

Throughout the program, my cousin and I continued to exercise together...eventually moving from stroller walks through her neighborhood to the treadmill at the YMCA.  That way, we could each move at our own speed (she ran, I walked) but still be together.  This actually pushed me to walk faster, with a goal of eventually matching her speed.  Unfortunately, I never made that goal.  After I'd lost about 80 pounds on the program, Kathy's husband's job moved them a couple hours away and not long after that, I moved to Florida.  It was in Florida that the fateful picture was found by the cousin I was living with at the time and the comment that still haunts me today was made.  And little by little, my willingness to persevere dropped away and the pounds slowly crept back on.  As I mentioned in the previous post, my cousin that I was now living with had never faced a weight issue, so she didn't really know how to help me and after her comment, my self-confidence plummeted.  Not to mention, that year was probably the hardest year of my life in so many areas...and when a food addict is stressing out, the first thing we do is look for food to calm our nerves.  And that's exactly what I did.

So...here I am, doing my Trim Healthy Mama thing, taking my Plexus (which, now that I understand better how it is supposed to help me is actually helping!), and doing the best I can...one meal/snack at a time!  I have fallen off that diet wagon more times than I care to count...so now, I'm trying a new wagon.  A healthy eating wagon...and no matter how many times I fall off, I am determined to get back up until I'm so secure in that wagon that falling off will just become a distant, painful memory of what I used to do!  :)

Food Addict

I haven't blogged here for awhile...mostly because I've felt like an absolute failure.  It's not Plexus or any other weight loss product or program that has failed me.  It's me.  I can NOT stay away from food.  And if you are going to eat past the point of feeling full (like, Thanksgiving-loose pants-lay on the floor full), then no weight loss product is going to work for you.  You have to be willing to listen to your body's full signals and STOP PUTTING FOOD IN YOUR MOUTH.  This is where I fail.  If the food tastes good and/or it might not be there for me later, I will eat it...and continue eating it until I literally cannot put another bite in my mouth without throwing up (unless I'm in public or around others, then I'll try to stay to eating a polite amount of food...but then there's always a chance I might binge later to make up for it).  I fight this ALL THE TIME...but I don't always win.  In fact, I lose the battle more often than I win.  And that's WHY I'm in the condition I'm in.

Hi.  My name is Kara.  I'm addicted to food.

Food feeds not only my body, but also my emotions.  When I think of my "happy place," I think of my grandmother's dining room table.  Sitting at that large, antique, wood table with the claw feet and high back chairs, all seemed right with the world.  It's the place where our extended family gathered for Sunday dinners and holidays...and everyone was almost always in a good mood.  It's where I sat with my grandparents for meals when my mother and I lived there for a short time between her divorce/remarriage and whenever I slept over (which I did as often as I could).  The smells of home-cooked meals my grandmother prepared for the family still make their way through my memory bank today even though my grandmother passed away several years ago.  My grandmother showed her love through food.  Her answer to every problem was food.  Feeling cranky?  You must be hungry, have a snack.  Kids acting up?  They must be hungry...here, feed them.  Feeling mad, angry, sad?  You must be hungry...have a cookie!  I don't blame my grandmother at all.  I know she was only trying to help.  Like me, her love language was food.

Does that mean I'm doomed to be overweight?  No...I don't think it does.  Sure...I could take it on as my excuse and that would make life easier.  Well, not really.  It would enable me to simply indulge in all my favorites and continue down the food addiction road, but like any addiction, it would cause (actually, has caused) me more problems than it ever solved.  Sure...an ice cream cone can melt away the anger, hurt, frustration in the moment...but it also adds numbers to the scale, which brings on other problems.  I am currently at my highest weight...a weight I NEVER thought I would EVER weigh...a weight I'm too ashamed to put into writing.  A weight that's at least 50 pounds heavier than I was in the picture my cousin, whom I was living with at the time after losing about 80 pounds, said that she didn't know if she could love me at that weight.  I don't think she understood what an impact her statement had on me.  She never really struggled with weight a day in her life.  But, I hear that statement in my head all the time and am actually thankful she can't see me now.  And every time someone rejects me or overlooks me, I am sure it's because of my weight.  It might not be the real reason...but it has become my reality.  And I start to think if only I could kick this food addiction and lose weight, my life would be better.  And in some ways, it will.

Being overweight...especially THIS overweight really gets in the way of how I'd like to live my life.  My body hurts, especially my knees.  I get out of breath walking down the driveway.  I can't fit into clothes well.  I can't be outside in the Florida heat for more than 5 seconds without sweating.  I won't even attempt to fit into places that have a potential of being too tight.  I've been embarrassed trying to fit into booths where the seats and table don't move before, so I don't sit in booths.  As much as I'd love to take my kids to a theme park and the local fair, I know I'll avoid the rides like the plague because there's a chance I won't fit properly and be asked to get off.  I can't enjoy doing things with my kids because getting on the floor (and trying to get back up) is too uncomfortable.  Doing much of anything is becoming too uncomfortable...and it makes me mad!

Who am I mad at?  Me, of course.  I'm mad because I let myself get this big.  I'm mad because I can't seem to say no to food without a major inner struggle.  Seriously.  I was at a women's Bible study a few weeks ago and someone at our table brought two boxes of Dunkin Donuts and I literally sat there the full two hours obsessing over those donuts and fighting with myself about not eating them.  Sure, I succeeded...at least in avoiding eating the donuts...but I couldn't tell you one thing that was taught at that Bible study.  And I completely obsessed about Dunkin Donuts after that...until I had one.  The funny thing is Dunkin isn't even my favorite type of donut.  Had it been hot & fresh Krispy Kreme, well...let's just say it would have been all over in 2 seconds.  And there wasn't even my favorite type of DD donut, boston creme, in the box.  But I felt like a strung out junkie in the throws of withdrawal staring at her next "fix."  And, I guess I was.

So...for several weeks now, I've been trying to follow the Trim Healthy Mama plan.  "Try" being the operative word here.  I have yet to make it a full week on plan...shoot, I don't think I've even made it a full day on plan.  But the beauty of this plan is that their motto is if you mess up, try again in 3 hours.  See...it takes your body 3 hours to process what you've eaten.  It will either process it as energy or fat, or some combo of the two, but nonetheless, it's processed.  So...you start again.  No more thoughts of, "Well, I've blown it...might as well enjoy whatever I can the rest of the day and try tomorrow...or next Monday...or next blue moon..."  You get the picture.  So, I keep trying.  And some day, I'll get it.  Thankfully, I have friends who are helping me because they are doing this too...and so, I'll keep trying.

As part of my accountability, I'm going to start blogging my journey again.  I don't know if anyone will even read this other than me...but I need to start doing something to get the thoughts out of my head and onto paper...er, computer.  LOL!  So...here it is.  If you're reading this, leave a comment and let me know.  :)  If you've ever struggled with food addiction, let me know.  If you're still struggling, let me know that, too...we can pray for each other.  If, like my cousin, you've never faced this struggle before, hopefully this will help you to understand the pain & struggle of your friend or family member that is facing it better.  :)

A Better Way

For most of my life, when others have talked about foods they can't have on a diet I have either been right there joining in the conversation with them...or feeling guilty that I'm not currently on a diet, knowing I need to lose weight.  Well, not any more...I have found a BETTER way!  :)  And it doesn't involve counting calories or fat grams, a list of forbidden or limited foods, "cheat" days, or hours at the gym!  I've said it before, and I'll say it again...it is BY FAR the easiest AND most effective thing I have EVER done to lose weight!  :)

The above picture is a perfect example of what happened with me this past Thursday night!  I was helping out at an event at our church, serving pizza before the event.  Next to me was a lady whom most would never imagine was on a diet or even needed to be...but as the night went on, I realized she was because she was talking with one of the other ladies from our church about the diet they were both currently on...one that involves powdered and/or pre-packaged meals and apparently (by what I gleaned from their conversation), only allowed ONE "cheat meal" per MONTH!!!  I have been on diets like this...and I can tell you from experience, there's nothing in me that would ever want to try that kind of diet again!  Just way too much temptation (which is something I don't deal well with), which means that the risk of failure is WAY too high!  All the while, we are serving pizza to those in attendance at the event...which means handling it (with gloves on), smelling it, seeing it...all those things that tempt the most.  When we were done serving, the other lady walked away, most likely feeling deprived...while I grabbed a slice of cheese pizza.  With the meal came 2 slices of pizza, chips and a drink.  I did have one more slice of pizza (because I don't like the edges, part of my first slice was still on my plate & later went in the trash) and a bottle of water...but that was it!  Once I had my almost 2 slices of pizza, I was completely satisfied and had NO desire for the chips (or anything else for that matter)...and neither did I feel the desire to have anything to eat once I got home after the event (which was several hours later).  AND...I lost weight!  :)

In fact, I've lost almost a full 4 pounds since my last blog post!  I am now at 27.4 pounds lost...I have now lost TWO POUNDS MORE weight than my 15-month old weighs!  It's not a fast weight loss, I'm averaging about a pound a week at this point (sometimes more, sometimes less)...but everything I've every heard or read about weight loss says that the healthiest (and most lasting) way to lose weight is to lose an average of 1-2 pounds per week.  So...I'm still on track!  :)  This is no fad diet!  It's not even a diet in the weight-loss sense of the word!  If I want pizza, I eat pizza (granted, I eat a lot less of it than I used to...but that's a GOOD thing)!  If I want cookies, I eat cookies.  NOTHING is forbidden and is only limited by me paying attention to my body's signals.  When I feel satisfied, I stop eating.  Of course, if I eat past the full point, I'm not going to lose weight.  This isn't a miracle pill where I could continuously eat more than my body needs and still lose weight...it just helps me to listen to my body's signals better by taking away the cravings and keeps me from feeling deprived.  As a result, food no longer has the control over me that it used to have, and I lose weight.  As far as I'm concerned, that's a win-win!

There are people taking Plexus that lose weight a lot faster than I am and a few that lose it a little slower.  Everyone's body is different...and that's OK.  That's exactly why you see on every weight loss product advertised with testimonials the disclaimer "results not typical, your experience may vary."  They do this to cover themselves.  They can't promise you will lose 30 pounds in 30 days because everyone is different.  By the same token, Plexus doesn't promise anything crazy like that, either.  BUT they do offer you a 60-day MONEY-BACK guarantee if you aren't satisfied for ANY reason!  I haven't seen too many other weight loss products offer that kind of guarantee!  Some offer a couple of weeks, maybe even as much as 30 days, but most offer no guarantee at all!  With 60 days, you have two whole months to see for yourself how Plexus works for you!  :)

I do sell the products...but I only do that because I believe in them and have seen the results myself!  I will not sell anything that I feel isn't a good value for the money...I don't believe in taking advantage of someone else just for the sake of a sale.  But, when I consider how much my health and energy has improved since starting Plexus, I can tell you, it's worth EVERY penny we spend on it!  I originally started selling Plexus simply so that I could buy it at wholesale...but when others started seeing how it was working for me, they wanted to know what I was doing and how they could get it, too.  And so...I started selling to others!  Now, I have two other people on my team who are doing what I do...getting their own product at a discount, and one of them has had such success she has long passed me!  :)  I love that I get to help others make something better of their lives by getting healthy, and for those who want it, earning an extra paycheck every month!  :)  If you are interested in Plexus, let me know!  You can order the products directly from my website (www.plexusslim.com/karaj) and they will be shipped to you in a few days.  If you'd like to know how you can order them at wholesale and even earn an extra paycheck by helping others, just contact me at karaj.plexus@gmail.com and I'll be happy to answer any questions you have and help you get started!  :)

Best Thing I Have EVER Done To Lose Weight!

Yes, I know...it has been a whole month since I last wrote my blog.  No, it's not because I stopped losing weight...it's just that life has been busy and I've been spending more time with family and less time on the computer.  As I mentioned last time, I watched the little guy I used to babysit for a week and then our homeschooling year began...and it's a busy one!  My 4th grader and I are both working on Memory Master with our Classical Conversations group...this means we will be memorizing 161 timeline events, as well as 24 weeks worth of History, English Grammar, Geography, Latin, Science, and Math memory work...and will recite it all at the end of the school year!  In addition to that, he is also taking the Essentials class that is part of Classical Conversations.  It's an intense Language Arts and Math program that will further prepare him for Challenge when he reaches 7th grade.  :)  So needless to say, that's where a chunk of my attention goes...not to mention my almost-15-month-old (and he demands as much Momma-time as he can get)!  ;)

So...that's why I haven't been writing...unlike previous times when I stopped writing because I stopped losing.  ;)  In fact, I'm now at 23.6 pounds lost!  I've said it before...and I'll say it again...this is BY FAR the EASIEST and MOST EFFECTIVE thing I have ***EVER*** done to lose weight!!!  Only twice in my lifetime have I lost more than I have this time around...and both times, I was strictly following a diet plan and exercising 5+ days per week!  And BOTH times, when I stopped exercising & dieting, I gained every pound I'd lost and then some...and much faster than I'd taken it off, too!

But with Plexus, I'm not following any strict diet plan, not counting calories or points, not watching fat grams, not suffering through fat-free and low-fat versions of foods just so I can stay within my food plan, not giving up the foods I love...and what's even better, no longer struggling with cravings!  What I AM doing is eating foods I love when I'm hungry, stopping when I'm full...and not eating if I'm not hungry!  I am continually amazed at how little amount of food fills me up sometimes!  Earlier this week, I went out to eat with a friend a restaurant famous for their wings.  My usual order at this restaurant is 10 boneless wings with fries and a side salad...and I've never had any problem finishing it...usually would even go for ice cream or something afterwards!  But, this night, it was 50 cent boneless wings night...so I just ordered 10 wings and a side salad.  I ate my salad and a few of the wings and felt completely stuffed, so I took the rest home.  It wasn't until I got home that I checked how many wings I had left and realized I had only eaten FOUR wings before feeling very full...and I didn't even get fries!  Today was another example...I wasn't very hungry at breakfast, so I just had coffee (I don't become human without my coffee!)...then when I went to do my grocery shopping, I realized I was hungry, so I got a chicken tender wrap (one of my favorites) at the Publix deli.  I sat down to eat it and after finishing half of it, realized I was full!  I didn't even have chips or anything with it (other than my Plexus drink)!  About 3 hours later, I realized I was hungry again, and finished the other half...and was completely satisfied!  SOOOO not like me before Plexus!  I'm still retraining my brain to pay attention to my stomach's signals...so, sometimes I eat too much before I realize it...and feel Thanksgiving-Dinner-full on less food than I would have normally eaten!

Another thing that still amazes me is that this former Diet-Coke-a-holic no longer likes the taste of Diet Coke or any other soda, for that matter!  I used to buy a 6-pack of 20-oz. bottles at the grocery store every week, not to mention all the Diet Coke I would drink when eating out, pulling through the drive-thru, or going somewhere like Target's Cafe.  Well, today, we cleaned out the fridge and found 5 Diet Cokes that expired in April...which was when I started taking Plexus!  I just don't care for them anymore!  And what's even more amazing...this formerly water-phobic girl (i.e. wouldn't drink water unless it was the only option or necessary for saving money) now CRAVES WATER!!!!  WHAT?!?!  Yep...I actually PREFER to drink water over any other beverage!  Occasionally, I'll have an unsweet tea or I'll put either lemon juice or Crystal Light in my water...but for the most part, I drink it plain...just ice and water!  :)

Also, the other two times I lost a significant amount of weight, I was serious about exercise!  The most weight I've ever lost was 80 pounds on a program through my church called First Place.  My cousin (who is an exercise fanatic) had already had me walking with her and became my personal weight-loss coach!  I loved hanging out with her, so the exercise didn't seem so bad.  We started by walking around her neighborhood (pushing her little girl in the stroller) several times a week...and eventually progressed to working out at the YMCA five days a week in the wee hours of the morning (this is when I discovered that 5 o'clock does indeed come twice a day)!  ;)  I did great with it all...until my cousin moved a couple hours away, and I eventually moved to a different state.  Slowly, the weight came creeping back on (though not nearly as slowly as it had come off)!  The other time was a few years ago when I decided to give Weight Watchers another go.  I was doing it secretly...planning to surprise my family at Christmas.  I was exercising at least 45 minutes per day on the elliptical (because it produced the most activity points, which meant I could eat more) and going to the gym at least 4-5 days per week...more if I could fit it in.  This worked well for a few months and I lost about 30 pounds...but then I lost my motivation and the cravings started to take over and the best I did after that was maintain for awhile...losing a few tenths of a pound here, gaining a few there, etc.  Eventually, I gave up.  I made a few more attempts at WW, but none were very successful because the motivation just wasn't there!

But with Plexus, there's no motivation needed!  I get up in the morning, take my accelerator and drink my pink drink...then just listen to my body for signals that I'm hungry or full!  That's really all there is to it!  In the pictures above, you see my "Before" picture that was taken at an Avon President's Club Recognition Luncheon.  I had NO idea just how fat I was then until I compared that picture with some my son took this morning!  I had him take the pictures this morning because I realized that the shorts that used to be too small and the belt that wouldn't even make it around me a few months ago not only fit, but I could put my fists in with the belt on the LAST hole!  I don't always realize how well I'm doing...and sometimes it seems the scale just won't move as fast as I would like it to move (or as fast as it seems to move for others)...but I just keep reminding myself of the moral of the Tortoise and the Hare...slow and steady wins the race!  As a dear friend reminded me today...we are running a marathon, not a 500 yard dash!  :)

So...if you would like to know more about this wonderful product that is literally transforming my body, email me at karaj.plexus@gmail.com, check out my Facebook page, or visit my Website (just click on the links).  If you think you can't afford it, consider becoming an Ambassador.  The annual membership is only $34.95/year and you can get your products at wholesale, as well as earn more money when others order from your website!  And trust me...when others see what Plexus is doing for you, they will want to know what you are doing - you might as well let them order from you and earn 15-25% of what they order!  It takes just 5 people ordering the combo and it's like getting your own product for FREE!  :)  Let me know if you have questions or want to get started!  I'd love to have you on my team!  :)

Weekly Weigh-in

Yep, it's FRIDAY!!!  For many people, that simply means the end of the work week and the beginning of their weekend.  For me, it's weigh-in day!  :)  Time to face the scale and see what it has to say about my progress for the week.  But, before I reveal the results, let me tell you a little about my week.

This was the last week I had completely free from responsibilities other than the normal everyday stuff of being the mom of two amazing boys.  Next week, I'll have the little boy I've babysat for the last year and a half (since he was 3 months old) while his mom goes back to work (she's a school teacher) and his new babysitter is on vacation (I will be the back-up babysitter this year so that I can focus more on homeschooling my oldest).  The week after that, we begin our first week of homeschooling for the new school year.  So, summer is officially over!  LOL!  But, we made the best of it!  :)

Monday I had lunch with a long-time friend at our favorite Mexican restaurant.  I ordered my regular meal (steak fajita quesadilla with the white cheese dip appetizer)...but ended up bringing most of the cheese dip home and half my quesadilla!  Monday night, I had a meeting at church for new middle school leaders and we were served sub sandwiches, chips, and a double-decker cookie cake for dinner (yep, had the cookie cake)!  Tuesday, the boys and I headed to the pool and had a relaxing day with friends.  I had some of the left over sub sandwich for lunch..and then we had Taco Tuesday at home for dinner!  Wednesday we had fun with friends at the park (i.e. the boys ran and played and I sat and chatted with my mommy friends) and then grabbed some lunch at Target while we got a birthday present for a party we will attend tomorrow (ya know Target has Pizza Hut pizza, right?).  Then we had Wednesday Night Dinner at our church...and since I'm not a fish eater (the main meal was crab stuffed sole), I opted for the alternative meal...cheeseburger and fries (and for some reason, they made mine a double!).  Thursday we had a MOPS playdate & ice cream social...but I had no desire to eat the ice cream...even when my 1-year-old was done after eating only half of his...so I gave the rest to my 9-year-old (who was happy to oblige!).  :)  We came home after that and had some leftover pizza that my hubby had brought home from a youth event after church the night before (I'd come home right after church to put the baby to bed).  Thursday night was my night out with a couple of friends before we attended a group meeting at church, and I had Chicken Teriyaki at the Sushi Thai restaurant where we went.  So...that will give you an idea of what my diet has been like this week before I weighed in this morning.  ;)  As far as exercise...I got in 30 minutes on the elliptical ONE morning this week (I think Wednesday) when I woke up early on my own.  THAT IS IT!!!!

Why did I tell you all that?  Well...you see, in spite of all of that, I still lost a pound this week!  I am now at 19 pounds total...and I have NOT done ANY dieting and VERY LITTLE exercise!  Yes, I know I could have lost so much more if I had actually made better choices in my eating and put in a few more days at the gym...but the great thing about Plexus is that I don't HAVE to do that or feel the least bit deprived while losing weight!  I'm certainly eating less than I was before taking Plexus (like bringing home part of my lunch) and some things have lost their appeal (like the ice cream at the social) - and that IS making a difference.  But, I'm not struggling to do it...it's happening naturally!  I'm not beating myself up over every bite I put in my mouth.  I'm not counting calories or killing myself at the gym.  And yet, I'm still losing weight at a healthy rate (roughly 1-2 pounds per week).  And even though it's been a few months, I'm STILL amazed at what Plexus is doing for me!  :)

If you would like to know more about Plexus, you can email me at karaj.plexus@gmail.com or check out my website: www.karaj.myplexusproducts.com.  If you'd like to know how you can earn money while you lose weight, I'd love to help you with that!  Just email me for more information!  :)  I also have a Facebook Page that you can check out if you are on Facebook - I post information, testimonials, and links to my weekly weigh-in blogs there...and sometimes I offer deals and/or contests!  :)  

Putting Things In Perspective

As I shared with you in my last post, we've had LOTS of junk food in our house the last couple of months...not to mention, Blue Bell ice cream was on sale TWICE (and was even BOGO last week!)...and if you have ever eaten Blue Bell ice cream, you totally understand what that means!  Oh yeah...I bought it and I enjoyed it!  :)  If you haven't tried Blue Bell, just think HOMEMADE ice cream...that's exactly what it tastes like!  It is by far the BEST store bought ice cream I have ever put in my mouth (second only to my grandfather's homemade peach ice cream, which I can't get anymore)!  But, we only buy it when it's on sale because it's six-something a half-gallon and that's not quite budget-friendly!  So, usually store-bought ice cream isn't a big temptation for me...but Blue Bell totally is!

Having said that...I HAVE been eating less junk this week and listening to my body's cues a little more...and it shows!  I lost 1.6 pounds this week...so I am now at 18.2 pounds of total weight loss!  Looking forward to that 20 lb. weight loss!  :)  I have not, however, gotten much exercise this week.  I did spend about 45 minutes playing Wii Sports on Monday...but then I was dealing with some monthly physical issues (trying not to be too TMI) this week and didn't feel up to doing much more than was necessary to get through the day. So, exercise did NOT happen after that.

I'll be honest with you...I was totally starting to get down on myself when the scale wasn't moving like it had been...or really, at all like I wanted it too!  But once I took a hard look at what I was doing and realized that part of that was related to how I was eating and what I was doing (or more accurately, NOT doing...namely, exercise!), then it started to make sense.  I have said before that you don't HAVE to follow a diet plan or exercise to lose weight with Plexus...and that is still true.  But, you DO have to be smart about what you eat and listen to your body, not just stuff whatever tastes good in your mouth and keep stuffing it past the point of full just because it does taste good.  Plexus is NOT a magic pill.  It will NOT cause you to lose weight regardless of what you do.  But, it WILL help you...if you are willing to do your part!  It takes away the cravings for unhealthy foods.  It helps you to feel full on less food.  But, you have to listen to what your body says in order to lose the weight.  Weight loss is both biological (as in eating correctly) and behavioral (as in making wise choices).  Plexus does help with both...but it doesn't do all the work for you.  You have to be willing to do your part...and that's the very important lesson I learned over the last few weeks.  Now...having said all that, I do want to add that if I had not been taking Plexus, rather than having maintained my weight, I totally would have gained some, if not all, of the weight I have lost so far.  So, I would say that is still very much a victory!  :)

By the way, I asked a friend who is also doing Plexus and who had previously done another product that is geared toward weight loss (Advocare) what the differences are between the two since I have friends and family who are doing the Advocare.  She told me that first of all, Plexus is a LOT less expensive and has been FAR more effective for her.  She told me that Advocare was geared more toward athletes, so unless you were willing to work out for hours each day, you wouldn't see much change.  She told me that other than when she did the cleanse with Advocare, she never lost anything on their products (and she used the products for quite some time).  She has lost 20 pounds so far on Plexus (since May) without dieting or exercise!  I think that says a lot for our products and am very glad to know her personal comparison!

For those of you who think Plexus is too expensive, it really boils down to just a little over $3/day.  That's about how much I used to spend on one soda at a restaurant or one coffee at a local coffee shop!  Since I now pretty much only want to drink water after my morning coffee (that I have at home), I have saved that much and more!  And, if you sign up to become an Ambassador, you will get your products at wholesale and can actually EARN money while losing weight!  You only need to find 5 friends to join you on the journey and order through you, and then your product is basically FREE every month because your commission will cover the cost of your product (and then some)!  :)  If you want to learn more and don't already have a Plexus Ambassador, contact me via email at karaj.plexus@gmail.com for more information and with any questions you may have.  :)  I would love to tell you more about how Plexus can work for you...and even how to earn an extra income while losing weight!  :)  If you just want to go ahead and order or check it out yourself, you can visit my website at www.karaj.myplexusproducts.com.  :)

Talk to you next week!  :)
Kara

Time for an Update! ;)

Sorry for the delay in posting updates...I have had a lot of "life" going on lately!  As I mentioned in my last post, my dad has been in the hospital.  He's home now, but he's still dealing with the health issues...most likely a life-long thing for him at this point.  My birthday also happened in this time span...which brings with it a whole host of issues (both good and bad)!  ;)  So, to just say "life happened" is probably a huge understatement, but is better than burdening you with all the crazy details!  LOL!

Anyway, my point being that no matter what you do to lose weight, life is going to happen.  You are going to have birthdays, parties, events, special occasions, sad times, stressful times, crazy-out-of-control times, etc.  You can't let that sidetrack you completely from the big picture!  If you do, then you fail.  BUT...if you pick yourself up (yes, I must say it...by your bootstraps!), and keep going, then you succeed!  You might not get there as fast as you would like, you may not do all you want to do...BUT, you will get there if you don't give up!

That's where I am today!  We have had a constant stream of cake and/or cookie-cake in our house since my son's 1st birthday in June...and I have enjoyed every single bite, I'm not gonna lie!  ;)  But, as a result, my weight loss the last couple of weeks has not been what I would like it to be.  On more than one occasion, I have eaten past the point of fullness...sometimes to the point of feeling stuffed (think: after Thanksgiving dinner stuffed)!  The good news is that I've felt this stuffed on far less food than I would have in the past!  I felt stuffed on less food than I would have normally eaten in a given sitting just 3 months ago!  And I'm thankful for that!  That, in itself, is progress!  And now that the eating out and sweets in the house period is over for the time being, I'm getting myself back on track!

So, while the scale hasn't really moved for me the last couple of weeks, I still feel like there has been success.  I'm more conscious of what I eat, I'm full (or even stuffed) on far less food, and unlike years prior to this, I have not gained significant weight eating as I have the last few weeks!  I usually gain 3-5 pounds during my birthday week...just from all the eating out (LOVE those free birthday meal coupons I get in my email inbox!) and cake!  But, in the last two weeks, I've only gained a pound (when I weighed in on Friday)...and by Monday, I had lost that pound.  I can only attribute this to the Plexus Slim that I've been taking!  There certainly hasn't been any exercise happening in my life lately...unless you count parking a little further away from the store from time to time, just because it was the first parking spot I found!  ;)  But, each day is a new day and I'm working myself up to actually getting some exercise into my daily (or at least weekly) routine!

I know two things happen when I actually do get regular exercise: (1) I feel better, and (2) I lose weight faster!  So, even though I'm still at an average of 1.5 pounds per week of weight loss, I really wanna ramp it up!  But, in order to do that, I've gotta drag my lazy butt out of bed at 6am...not something that comes easy to this non-morning-person gal!  I'd much rather exercise mid-morning...it's when I'm more awake and have the energy to go...but, that doesn't work well for my schedule during the week.  In order to get to a gym that has child care, I have to drive across town...and I have to get there and complete my workout before noon. Between my 9-year-old who shares my aversion to mornings and my 1-year-old who takes a mid-morning nap, this makes doing this nearly impossible.  So, if I'm going to fit this in on a regular basis, I either need to resolve myself to getting up earlier (and missing out on that precious last-minute morning sleep while hubby showers) or go in the evenings after hubby gets home...but that would make my exercise sporadic at best because of the things I'm involved in that meet in the evenings and my desire to spend time together as a family when we are all home.  So...mornings it is!  Please pray for me!  I'm gonna need it!  ;)

God bless you all...no matter where you are on your journey!  Regardless of whether you don't really need to lose weight, are in the process of losing weight, or need to lose weight but haven't found the motivation...I pray that you enjoy reading my blog and find some enjoyment/encouragement from it!  :)  Feel free to leave comments or contact me at karaj.plexus@gmail.com for more info.  :)

Weekly Weigh-in Report

My hubby was off today, so we slept in and I weighed in a few hours later than I usually do...but it was still before I had breakfast, so I'm going with it.  :)  I am down another 2.6 pounds this week, which makes my grand total 17.4 pounds since April 19th.  :)

In addition to the loss on the scale, I also had a non-scale victory.  Wednesday, I put on a size 22 jeans and not only did they fit, but they were actually a little loose.  :)  While some people would be sad about that size, it actually was a victory for me!  You see, before my Plexus journey began, I couldn't even fit into a size 24...and I refused to buy any size larger than that, so I just bought pants with elastic & vague sizing so that I didn't have to face how big I was getting.  But, Plexus is changing all that!  :)  I knew I needed a belt with those size 24 jeans I was finally fitting into, so I decided to give my 22's a shot...and was pleasantly surprised that they fit!  Later that evening at church, a friend noticed me hitching them up and said, "Pants getting loose?"  I was happy to report to her that not only were they loose, but they were at least 2 sizes smaller than what I'd worn before!  :)

It's been a crazy week...my dad went in the hospital Tuesday night with many health issues.  I'm 650 miles away, so I'm having to rely on family for updates.  Thankfully, they've been pretty good at keeping me posted.  But, I'm having a hard time focusing, as you can imagine.  Sorry for the short post, but I am literally worn out from worrying about him.  If you believe in God, please say a prayer for my dad.  <3  

God bless!